Humanistic Couples Therapy and Counseling

Topics in couples therapy vary among couples. Usually, partners talk about conflicts that every couple has to balance and that can be very sensitive, for example …

giving and taking,

leading and following,

autonomy and attachment,

stability and change or

closeness and distance.

When a relationship or partner very strongly leans to one of these poles, couples therapy can be of help. There are also other more specific topics that can be addressed, for example separation counseling, loss of love in relationship, problems in dealing with sexuality, addressing fidelity, constant quarrels as well as reconciliation culture, family counseling and parenting, trust and suspicion, (new) forms of partnership or separating or staying.


Couples therapy goals generally have in common that congruence between the partners is promoted. By helping clients gain better access to their own emotions and needs and thus being able to better understand and accept themselves, they should be able to understand and accept each other better. Person-centered couple therapy gives clients the chance to find their own relationship definition and to determine themselves in which areas and in which direction they want their relationship to change. The goal in all of those processes is always:

What do you want your partner to understand that has not been understood, yet?

Couples Therapy Processes

Couples therapy is generally shorter than a single psychotherapy, but should not be less than five to ten sessions. It is advisable to plan the first three sessions closely together so that counselor and clients get to know each other. It may be advisable to have one-on-one sessions with each partner so that individual wishes can be better articulated and understood. Empathy, unconditional positive regard as well as authenticity are the most basic variables in couples therapy. Couples therapy is not paid by health insurance companies. I offer divorce mediation for partners that in the process of divorcing.